Today I pulled up the calendar on my phone, and in super bold letters with an exclamation mark, it told me that I was supposed to be in Atlanta. This was THE weekend. The weekend we were supposed to depart for lovely Croatia.
It hit me like a ton of bricks. This whole year seems almost wasted. I know it's not, but it's hard to reconcile everything we did to make this dream happen, to what is now happening in the world and with us. I know I should be thankful. I know I should realize that my problems are very 1st world, and truly I have very few problems compared to some. I do and I am aware of that, but it doesn't take the sting away from the fact that we aren't going to Europe.
Even our blog title seems mocking at this point. "Travelling Reinoso's" feels like a lie to me. I know that's not true. I know that we are gypsies at heart and travel at the drop of the hat all the time. Please, one of my life goals is to fill each passport before it expires, so I know we are travelers. Ugh.... it's just a whole lot of "I knows", which is sheerly an intellectual response to my thoughts, but that doesn't address the emotional side of things.
We uprooted our lives! Drastically reduced our material possessions, pulled the kids from the school they loved and transitioned in online school, moved into a tiny condo that was supposed be just a launching off spot, not a permanent home......and now this!! I can't help but be a little miffed that I left the perfect "prepper" set up and then just a few months later we are in a global pandemic. I had a garden! Toilet paper stored for months! Pretty much everything I could have needed I had. Now, not so much.
It the whole scheme of things this is all minor, but it's still a loss. So, starting today, I'm declaring this weekend my weekend of mourning. Today is a carb day....baking cookies and bread that I plan to stuff in my face with abandon. Not the same thing as a lovely dinner in Atlanta, but hopefully comforting. While staying home may be "flattening the curve" around the world, it's definitely not flattening any of my curves, but for today I've decided not to care.